Steve is ever the entertainer in these situations, and I'm very glad for it. His juggling, hacky sacking, card tricks, etc. help take the awkwardness out of the situation. It's WAY easier to laugh and play with these kids than to try to have a conversation with them. It's pretty rare for any of them to know English, and those that do, don't know much at this age. The girls on staff with GIBTK translate for us as necessary, but it feels right for us to get in there and play with them. It's cute because at basically every stop with a new set of kids, at least one child will "claim" you as her own, and you'll find yourself pulled in this direction or that so that she can show you something, get a different game going, or hang a little closer than the others. At this stop, it was Hyuen (pronounced "when"), a precious five-year old that you would seriously want to take home with you. Honestly, you feel like that with them all though...
One thing that I love that is part of this culture is how little personal space that they need. I'm not noticing so much that people are talking too closely to my face or anything like that, although I know that others notice that. What I love is that they are very touchy, but it feels just welcoming and affectionate in a friendly and tender way. The girls that are GIBTK staff, the kids at the orphanages, and the other locals that we are meeting will just hug you, wrap their arm around your waist, link their arm in yours, put their hand on your leg, hold your hand... it's VERY different from what we are used to.
Next we were off to the Hai Chau Orphanage. Most of the kids here had been dropped off by their parents because they couldn't afford to take care of them anymore. The really crazy thing, and the thing that makes me feel the pain that these kids must feel, is that their parents only dropped off one of their kids and kept the others. Can you even imagine being the child that your parents took to the orphanage?? There is one situation there where two of the boys are brothers... dropped off at different times, first the older boy, followed eventually by the younger one.
Duyen was the girl who claimed me here. She is 11 and was another beautiful and sweet kid. We took the kids out to a nice lunch, and she spent much of our time teaching me Vietnamese and proper pronunciation by reading the menu. When we go out with our own kids, or if we're with a group of kids, we (and I think you) put limits on what the kids can order..."You can choose this or this. Share that with your sister." etc. But these kids are so used to having their standard rice with some fish or meat maybe, that when they get to go out, Robert just lets them get whatever they want, and they go to town!!! It's pretty fun to see actually. They are used to so little that it is just a joy to indulge them. So, on to the ice cream parlor for further indulgence :)
We headed back and cleaned up for an hour or so, and then headed back to Hoi Ahn. We visited the Hoi Ahn Orphanage, and could see a significant difference in the feel and in the kids. Although, this orphanage, which is not associated with GIBTK, is government run, it's administration is not the best. Steve heard one of the adult men yelling at a kid, for example. The kids were way more rowdy and disrespectful with each other. There were a few other "gringos" there, which was nice to see, and we came in with our bubbles, balls, candy, and other goodies again. Steve and I checked out the first main rooms. I picked up a crying baby, maybe 6 months old, and once you've got 'em, there's no setting them down until we're loading back on that shutle bus. At one point I had one on each hip because as I walked around the beds of the other kids in this "high needs" area, talking to them, a little blind toddler stood up with her arms held high for me to pick her up. How can I refuse that? Thankfully, I've been toting kids for long enough that I can double do it without much problem, and off we went.
When we left the orphanage, we grabbed dinner in Hoi Ahn, peeked into a few shops, and headed back to Sandy Beach to crash.
Today was an early start to a very cool day. We drove out to Dai Loc (maybe a half hour drive) to visit poor families in need of "compassion houses." A compassion house is what we and some friends raised money for with the "Costume Party with a Purpose." We'll get to see that house and meet that family on Thursday!
The very first stop of the day was an emotional one. The woman that we went to see had JUST lost her son and brother (or brother-in-law) in a motorbike accident five days ago. Her husband died the same way (hit by a truck while riding his motorbike) five years ago. The woman was 39 and was there with her 78-year-old mother-in-law and her 18-year-old (remaining) son. I just felt her pain so much. Her loss was so fresh. It turned out that Robert felt that her house was do-able, but that GIBTK could help her family in another way. He told the son (who said that he'd like to be a lawyer some day) that if he would like, GIBTK would get him prepared to take the entrance exam (they have done this before with a group of kids), and if he studied hard and passed, they would pay for him to go to a university. His mother had been prepared to beg family for a loan, but now this boy has the chance to reach his goals, which include being able to help support his mother and grandmother. It's cool to see how much this day and this generosity can impact a whole family and even community (and even the world!). When we left I gave the woman a hug, and she just started sobbing, which as most of you know, means that I'll start sobbing. So, after many tears and my attempts at supportive and affection words, we were off to our next "cry-fest" as Steve called it.
We went to three more houses, but the fifth house of the day was very special for us in particular. Steve has a very generous heart, but he wants to help people who do what they can to help themselves. When we went into this house, he was so impressed that although it was little more than a shack, it was very clean in and around it. A hot meal for the family was on the small (child's patio-type) table. Clearly, the woman who we were about to meet did much with very little. Her story went like this: She is 34 or 35 with four children ranging in age from 15 down to 4 or so. She had a stroke 3 years ago that left her paralyzed on the right side of her body. Her husband left her at that time because he couldn't deal with it (those are my words), took her now 12 or 13-year-old son with him (jerk- my words again), and recently married another. She needs a wheelchair or major assistance to get around and is selling lottery tickets in the street to support her other three children. She makes $1 a day on a good day, but she can't sell every day because of her physical limitations, etc. Wow!! We are all so ridiculously blessed, and when you see people in need like this, and know that you have the ability to help impact their lives in a SIGNIFICANT way, of course you do it...
The crazy thing is that this house hadn't been on the radar until just recently. It was not in Robert's original plan to go check it out (his staff had recently researched it), and yet here we were (a God thing in my opinion). Not even knowing that Robert was listening to this and wondering where he would find the funds to help this lady, Steve told me to tell Robert that we wanted to get this family a home. Robert had Steve and I tell her (while one of his staff translated) that we would like to build her a house and why, and she just started sobbing. We hugged and I thought she might never let go. I think the last time I saw Steve that emotional was either when our kids were born or when his grandmother died. He was just very moved by her situation and her determination to do what she had to do. The saying that you are "blessed to bless" has two meanings to me... we are blessed with certain things so that we can share them with others, AND that we are seriously blessed when we bless others.
Steve and Robert have been spinning their brains on what else can be done for this lady, and they practically have a roadside convenience store business plan mapped out for her. It's cool to see Steve's talents for business put to action in this way. He's so excited. I swear he'll probably want to come build the house himself! He was already keeping his eye out at the Big-C for furniture for her today ;) I forgot to mention that only furniture in the house is the small kids' resin table and chairs, one narrow, little, console-type table with a skinny, little bench, and a twin-sized bed (which is a raised, slatted, wood pallet) for FOUR people. We asked, "Do they all sleep on the one bed?" Answer: "Yes." They move that skinny, little bench over to the side of it to try to make more room. So, GIBTK put a bed on her list of goodies. They're bringing a couple of bikes to the kids, and Ko (Daisy in English) will get a new wheelchair (her last one broke).
We saw another home, then headed back to the hotel. It had a been a long and emotional day. Steve went shopping at the Big-C with Dave and bought a bunch more toys for the kids, while I took a breather here. Then he, Ashley (Steve's cousin who lives in South Korea currently), and I headed to Marble Mountain for a hike up to see the caves and pagodas. We got a late start, but managed to see sunset at the top and check out this cool place.
Here are some pics from the last couple of days.
Thanks for keeping tabs on us!!
xoxo
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| On the road to Dai Loc. We are amazed at the loads that they place on these little motorbikes. |
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| Rice field |
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| Rice cakes drying on the side of the road |
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| Ashley and Huang walking arm and arm, which is so typical here. |
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| Cemetery in the countryside |
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| Pure Vietnam |
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| The family that lives here will receive a new home and a college education for their 18-year old, eldest daughter. She was amazingly bright, and it's neat to see that this will literally change EVERYTHING for this hard working farm family. Their monthly income to support themselves, mom, and four kids: $10 US |
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| I believe this is Grandma at that house. I just thought she was gorgeous. |
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| Ashley explaining to the family that she'd like to build a home for them. |
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| This is the neighbor's kitchen. She dragged (literally) me over to her place to campaign ;) |
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| Steve and the son hacky-sacking with a very unusual "sack." |
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| The "hacky-sack" |
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| This was another family's home who will be getting a new house. Steve is pointing at a little water pump they use to get some water to the house through a little hose outside. |
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| Their pig... That pen looks miserable, but we were pleased that they at least had the pig and a couple of chickens. |
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| Out front of one of the places. We draw quite a crowd of neighbors, etc. |
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| That's a little duck farm. See the tiny ducklings gathered in the water pen? |
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| This is Ko's family's home, the one that we will sponsor |
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| The house was divided into two sections. This is the back section, the kitchen area. |
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| This bed is in the front section with a drape/shower curtain type of divider. This is where this ENTIRE family sleeps, but not for long!! |
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| Steph explaining to Ko that we would like to have a home built for her and why. You can see the drape around the bed behind Steve. |
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| Lots of tears. I can only imagine the relief she must feel that people are willing to help her family. |
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| "Our" family |
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| Tobacco leaves drying along the road. There is a RJ Reynolds factory in DaNang. I'm guessing this will be headed there. |
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| Steve and Steph on Marble Mountain. We met have met some vets here, and apparently one of them was on top of the mountain in the background for forty-five days when he served here as a marine. |
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| Crazy Americans |
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| Pagodas on top of the mountain which is home to ten monks |
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| The mountain has tons of caverns with shrines and buddhas, etc. inside. See the big one behind the shrine? |
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| Overlooking China Beach. Our hotel is down toward the right. Steve's dad was on China Beach when he received the telegram from the Red Cross that Steve had been born. |
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| Cool architecture |
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| Yuna and a little friend at one of the orphanages |
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| Ashley and my little ball player |
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| Playing catch with one of the little balls that we gave out along with other goodies |
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| Steve teaches a little juggling class :) |
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| This was hilarious! Steve did one of his best card tricks in which the card that was picked ends up somewhere far from the deck. In this case, it was in this girl's pocket. She screamed bloody murder when she saw the card in her pocket and threw it at Steve like it was alive and going to get her. Good times! |
